To all the men in the world: I’m sorry.

An apology on behalf of all women.

Dear Brothers,

I’m sorry. I’m truly sorry.

While I don’t know you personally, I want to write this letter to you on behalf of all women. I hope and pray that it will speak truth in your life and call you to experience mercy in a new way, and a deeper relationship with Jesus Christ.

I am writing this letter because of the profound impact YOU and other men have had on my life. With that said, I also recognize the profound impact that my behavior, and sometimes hurtful actions have had in your own life. I want to ask for your forgiveness in all the ways I have hurt you and all the ways I have failed to call you to greatness.

I feel deep sorrow about the destructive ways my sisters and I have treated you in the past. Please allow me to apologize:

I am sorry for all the times I’ve hurt you, messed up, lied to you, or the way I have talked about you. I’m sorry for the ways I have manipulated you and allowed my jealousy to not trust you.

I’m sorry for the comments, the gossip, and the negativity that I have stirred up. I’m sorry for all the ways I have used you. I’m sorry for the dishonesty, and the hurt I have caused in the deepest part of your heart. I’m sorry for the ways I haven’t acknowledged your masculinity.

For all the ways I never affirmed you, I am sorry.

I am sorry for all the times I have led you into sin; perhaps it was by the context of our conversation, by what I was wearing, by the song that was playing or the movie we were watching—I am sorry. The truth is: You don’t deserve to live in sin. You don’t deserve darkness. You deserve the best.

For all the ways I have failed you, I am sorry. I promise to do better. I know who I am as a daughter of God, and I recognize you as a beloved son of God. I feel deep love, great respect and an appreciation for the gifts of your masculinity. I want to help foster your growth as a man, as a future father and as the spiritual leader God is calling you to be.

I desire to honor the beauty and integrity of your body. I long for a friendship with you that is built on the foundation of Christ. I desire to journey with you to sainthood. I want the best for you. I love you and I am praying for you. Please forgive me.

Your sister in Christ,

Kelly

____________________________

Kelly Colangelo has been involved in youth ministry for nearly a decade spreading the Gospel message at retreats, rallies and conferences across the country. Her hope is to challenge youth to be everything God intended them to be… and go to heaven of course! Kelly has appeared on EWTN’s Life on the Rock, and has been a contributor to Life Teen blogs. She is also part of the Steubenville Summer Youth Conference Ministry Speaking Team. Kelly currently serves as the Director of Youth & Young Adult Ministry at a parish in Florida. She received her Bachelor’s at Niagara University and has a Master’s degree in counseling from Syracuse University. You can find more information about Kelly at www.kellycolangelo.com.

20 Comments

  1. Thank you for this post. There were times when I felt like we girls and women are putting all the fault on men shoulders, treating sometimes all the men like some culprit because we experienced sufferings because of a few of them. And yes, some men are just the worst and so far from God, but no one talked about how some of these men were influenced in a bad way by us girls. Some male friends talked to me about their past relationships and some of them changed for the worse because of a girl. Also, I really like the quote of Jason Evert ”when a culture of lady arises, a culture of gentlemen follows”. Therefore, I am sorry too.

    By Adina | 1 month ago Reply
    • Thank you Adina, you are right on the mark for me! God bless you sister!

      By Phil | 1 month ago Reply
  2. Hi

    Thank you so much for this you have no idea what reading those words meant to me. I was completely blind sided and did not except what happened to me to be happening. But I’m thankful that I’ve left the life of sin and can focus on improving my relationship with God and wait for his grace upon my life. Thank you once again.

    By Christian | 1 month ago Reply
  3. I really like the articles on chastityproject.com. I always recommend the website to young people who struggle with sexual sins. Looking forward to an article similar to this one, by a young man entitled “To all women in the world, I’m sorry.” This would go a long way to the healing of the relations between the sexes.

    By Fr. Micael Maria | 1 month ago Reply
  4. This is beautiful. Thank you.

    By Rob | 1 month ago Reply
  5. Thank you. I needed this. At least coming from another lady. Just had a break up. I just imagined she’s the one saying this. But I want to say that I’m sorry, for the lack of compliments and letting you feel the lack of acceptance on my part, though it’s not really what’s in my heart. I accept you for who you are but will always want you/us to improve. I’m sorry too.

    By Romel Yao | 1 month ago Reply
  6. Kelly,

    This letter came in a perfect time of my life. Thank you !

    By Eric | 1 month ago Reply
  7. Hey, you are way nice.

    Thanks.

    But, it’s more difficult for you girls. Which meaning that it’s really really really difficult for you girls .. because yes … it is also difficult for us guys.

    GOD Bless you.

    By Kelly | 1 month ago Reply
  8. “By that song that was playing in the movie…” Did u produce the song?hmm

    By Lena | 1 month ago Reply
  9. “By that song that was playing in the movie…?” Did u write or produce the movie/song? I don’t get the logic behind this

    By Lena | 1 month ago Reply
  10. I am utterly amazed that you as a counselor would think you should apologize on behalf of all women. You should spend more time educating those who have the misfortune of growing up without good direction instead of judging and implying all women have or should feel guilty of sins you may have. You need to make your own amends and reconciliation. I pray you stop hurting women through you poor choices.

    By Karen | 1 month ago Reply
  11. God is so good…working in the lives of those whom He has called. Deciding to remain single after my 2nd divorce, and after many years of both personal self-reflection and a deep reflection upon all the moral decay i see in the world, I have come to the conclusion that we, as women, need to be re-united with the Gospel of truth as to the role we are called upon to live up to, especially as it applies to marriage and parenting. I, too, offer up my apologies to all the men I have mislead…through my words and through my actions of impropriety.

    By Heidi | 1 month ago Reply
  12. Beautiful words and filled with love. I’m sorry as well and will work to appreciate your true inner beauty.

    By Richard | 1 month ago Reply
  13. Wow! Beautiful! As a 52 yr. old Mom of 2 boys – thank you. I’m sorry for my past actions and I pray for young people dating today. Extremely Difficult culture to date in. Stay close to God and surround yourself with strong Christian friends.

    By Carol | 1 month ago Reply
  14. Thank you to be this voice, I’d love to hear it directly from some women I met but, oddly enough, It’s never heard articulated by any. This heal me a lot today. My prayers for you.

    By Daniel Cevallos | 1 month ago Reply
  15. Hey! Great article! Does this website have a Facebook page?

    By Zach | 1 month ago Reply
  16. I forgive you. Please forgive me when my brothers have lied, cheated and abused you. God does call us to greatness and glory. Your words, who you are, is like a breath of fresh air straight from the holy spirit. God bless you and thank you for being my sister in Christ, I could not have asked for a better one.

    By Dakota | 1 month ago Reply
  17. This has been the letter I wish I would have shared with so many young men whom I really hurt and confused with my jealousy and selfishness. Every time I saw you after and you quickly looked away my heart broke because I know I did damage. You guys do deserve the best and for women to treat you objectively rather than like a brother, like a friend is wrong and speaks against your humanity. Until recently (these past few years) I have never known what a genuine frienship with a man could really be like. And I’m testifying here and now that it’s incredible. I’ve missed out and i’ve hurt a lot of people. I hated hurting you and I still do. But like so many others, it was all I really knew how to do. I am so thankful for the freedom I have to truly love the men in my life now, to not hurt them but encourage them. I praise the Lord who brought me this freedom! From Him alone is glory ever lasting 🙂

    By Carolyn | 1 month ago Reply
  18. To every girl or woman who reads this and thinks it’s your fault. I want you to know right now that IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT. You did nothing to bring this in yourself. You deserve to be treated with dignity, respect and humanity because you are in fact human.

    You do not need to unreservedly apologise for ‘leading men astray’. Good Christian men who follow an amazing God know that he is their saviour and would never have looked to you.

    You are amazing and wonderful even with the stain on your soul. This woman does not speak for you. You speak for yourself.

    By Jo Holroyd | 1 month ago Reply
  19. No, this is not on behalf of all women. My sons are responsible for their own thoughts and actions, as is mg husband.

    By Laura Taylor | 1 month ago Reply

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